Month: January 2012

  • Do You Feel Lucky…

    Punk!..Well Do ya?


    So today is Friday the 13th, and is aparently mostly considered to be unlucky.

    Well tosh to that I say!

    In my mind Luck is more indifferent, so why can’t today just be a lucky day, neither good nor bad.

    I consider myself lucky, I live very comfortably I’ve had almost no hardship of any type (physical or emotional) and I am largely free to do what I enjoy.

    But what I like about luck the most is coincidence, lucky timing, being in the right place at the right time.

    And those aspects of luck I feel are tied into Intuition and our ability to interact with the more subtle layers of life and perception.

    Some people think that Luck can be seen as a skill to be honed and developed, and I actually think there may be some stock in this.

    If you spend your time developing your perception and awareness, your intuition and gut feeling. You’ll be giving yourself the best possible change to tap into Luck and all the often incredible benefits that come with it.

    Luck is sort of innocent, it’s an event where the best thing happens for someone or something with no reason or loss to anyone else. I think it becomes stronger if you believe and trust in it and I most certainly wish it on all reading this.

    A motto I often say to myself is “It’s better to be lucky than good” because I’ve never seen myself as all that skillful in anything. And when given the chance to create a character for my self in a computer game, i’ll often choose luck over other attributes. So bottom line is Be Lucky today…be lucky EVERY day and rejoice in the luck you already have :D


  • Silliness

    Back in November I stopped shaving to try and see if I could do it for a whole month…and yay I did :P

    But It was annoying and I was very glad to be rid of the fuzz afterwards…but while shaving I too a few amusing pics, which I’ve been meaning to post for AGES.

    So here is what happens when I go all beardy…(with apologies to the Jewish people ;)


    Before:

    And no I don’t wear that while I shower :/ lol

    The Internet Marketer Look:

    Sheesh thats a bad side for me :P

    I look a bit mad here o.0

    Slightly more cropped:

    The Daring English Rake:

    Hell-o Totty!

    And of course You knew it had to happen :P whats most worrying is…It kind of works :-O

    Sadly as someone suggested I did not get round to doing the V for Vendetta guy :/ maybe next time.


    In other news I’ve lost an awesome shot of me Planking that I was going to post here :(

    And I’ve been annoyingly busy working in Town….with people!! I wanna go back to my safe little digital world.

    Also I REALLY REALLY want to read ALL your blogs, and by you I mean my lovely friends! <3 I will try to get to them when I have free time, and after I’ve gotten back on with all my various other IM projects :/ urrrgh why can’t you just get the money and not have to do the whole work thing?…has anyone even tried that? :P hehe

  • Strange Thoughts under the Moon.


    Tonight I walked outside to see the nearly full moon which was big and bright in a clear cool sky.

    I walked up onto the road near our house and stopped to listen to the night.

    I could hear the sea not too far away hissing like white noise or a distant stream.

    I could hear drips hitting the metal shed in our garden.

    I could hear the light wind passing through the trees of a near by copse.

     

    And as I stood there I had the urge to go for a walk up the road, as it shone in the white moonlight it seemed magical and inviting. But I also wanted to go back inside, where it was warm and I could get back onto my computer and see if someone was online.

     

    As I paused not sure what to choose, I looked up and saw pale clouds moving quickly over the moon. The wind must have been stronger up high were they hung and so they slid unrealistically quickly over the black blue of the night sky and the bright white of the moon.

     

    Caught in indecision and by the strange beauty of these clouds I was engulfed with strangeness. A feeling I’ve had several times before when I find myself stuck in a moment I don’t want to end, while desiring a future I cannot decide on. And as I considered this concept I realised I had also begun to think of my past, of how many times I’d been on this road, had walked its length and all the places around me.

     

    And my conclusion was that once again the often heard wisdom of being ‘in the moment’ holds so much truth. We spend our lives deciding on the future and pining for the past, when there are endless wonders right there if we were just to look up and see them.

     

    But in the end I just stood there for a few minuets planning this post as the moon slowly faded behind the clouds and then went inside, so once again living in some future…plus I needed to get up early so I shouldn’t stay up too late walking up the road right? ;)

     

    But if I was to look for an answer to any of these thoughts from tonight then I think it was the feeling. That ‘strangeness’ and infact any emotion, they are often far more flowing and seemingly random than our thoughts, and perhaps if we become more aware of them we could gain the ability to sense the correct action for that moment or simply be able to find an awareness for the moment.

     

    Powerful moods draw us into the moment that create them, so enter with awareness and fully engage with now once in a while…it’ll leave you with a nice memory :P hehe    

  • The Power and The Saint

    Well bit of an interesting few days all round :D

    First I hope you’ll notice that this is the first post with my new Username SaintBlue1131, a MASSIVE thanks to everyone who gave me eprops and minis, and suggestions. I wish i could have picked them all.


    Now some of you will have noticed that i vanished for about three days recently and here’s why:

    That is whats left after the power company guys re-spliced our power/phone cable which had been cut by the bail forks of a local farmers tractor!

    Luckily the power was only off for an hour and no one was hurt, but the phone line and thus the internet was also cut and that didn’t get sorted untill this afternoon.

    Also coincidentally in the local news a much bigger more powerful powerline had recently been cut by a digger (or backhoe for the American readers) and the driver was killed! :O

    But this one was small and the Farmer didn’t even notice :S

    So not only was I off visiting a friend over Saturday and Sunday morning, but I then couldn’t get back online and had to endure the torment of a whole day and a bit with no Xanga!! :-O


    But I’m back and my all newly named and everything, so hopefully I’ll be catching up with you all and back to my addicted obsessive online self once again ;)

  • I Name Thee…

    Currently I have 8,500 Credits! and once I get to 10,000 I’ll be hoping to change my username since I made this username WAAAAYYYYY back when I thought I was just going to use Xanga for an addition to Internet Marketing and randomly picked my initials and the 1131 which I just kind of like because it looks good in digital clock type font :P

    So bottom line the name’s gonna change…but what to?

    I have a few options but am more than happy to hear suggestions and ideas so here is a list of what I’ve thought of, but please feel free to come up with anything even if it’s unrelated:

    SaintBlue1131 (This has become quite common for my online accounts now, since it has not only the numbers which I still like, but also my favourite colour and a link to my name sake)

    St.Beaumains (Again the saint thing and Beaumains which was going to be my name if i’d not been called Bede)

    ElevenThirtyOne (I think you can guess the reasons for this one)

    LittleCakes (I’m sure there’s at least one person on Xanga who would want this in the list lol, i’m not sure i’d go for it though…sorry ;)

    BlueBede (I once had a small plastic Blue Bead which I quite liked and again colur and name with a pun…and I do love puns hehe)

    I’m sure there are lots more that I thought of but for now thats all I can think to list, but i’ve got some time yet so first of all COMMENT and give me more props lol :P and also give me some suggestions :D

     

  • Storms

    What to post?…hmmm damn I’ve been Xanga blocked for what seems like weeks!!

    Ah well in reality it’s been something like a couple days since I last posted :P but still I need a topic or something random and interesting, or maybe something other than SuperHeroes to create and get lovely comments about lol

    But for now I shall fall back on the only thing that will always be there for the cold damp people of the UK to talk about…the Weather.

    Over the past several weeks if not months now :( it has been dark, not Antarctic dark admittendly but close enough. Currently and over the winter months it get’s light around 9:00AM maybe 8:30 and then dark again at 4:00. this is bad enough but when you combine it with the endless storms we’ve been having and thick cloud cover (with plenty of rain) you basically end up living inside in twilight for most of winter.

    Light as my recent angel suggest is vitally important, infact there is a certain school of thought that says that ALL of the worlds religions are actually just based on us worshipping the Sun. But I don’t intend to start a thological debate I’m just using it as an example of it’s importance :P

    And accordingly when you are living without the vital rays of solar warmth you end up feeling SAD (or Seasonal Affective Disorder) yes for all you annoying people who live in sunny warm places it really does exist :/ And it’s kind of surprising how it makes you just stop wanting to live basically. I’ve not wanted to wake up, i’ve not wanted to work, to deal with people. I’ve pretty much just turned into a sullen teenager :P

    And what annoys me most is that being a big beliver in Self Help stuff and being posetive I’ve kept wanting to just ‘snap out of it’ or be more up beat…but the truth is either it’s simply an effect of chemicals in my brain or there just isn’t enough things to be jolly about for me at the moment so I’ve been for the most part unable to change my mood at all :|

    I’m still pretty sure we can change everything about us…but it’s always daunting when you are faced with something that out matches you and just leaves you powerless. On the upside though it does also give you an oppertunity for patience and self control which in it’s self can help to make you feel strong and of value, guess it all depends on how you look at it.


    Anyway if you are still with me after all that :? Recently I’ve gone into town! :) first time out of the house and local area for got to be near a month lol

    And I might be quite busy soon, there are at least two Website jobs looming, and I’ve recently bought some stuff for Internet Marketing and Online Business, which will mean LOTS more learning and with luck some profits.

    Plus on Sat I’ll be off to visit a friend and stay over :) AND I have to consider if I should head down south into England soon and help out my Uncle, not sure about that because 1: I’m busy and 2: I don’t wanna miss Xanga time :D

    So things to consider, weather to survive and cheesecake to eat ;) not all bad then :)

  • I’m a Winnetou

    So a couple days ago I got a package in the post and guess what was inside! :D

    It was my awesome prize from the even more Awesome @bmojsilo s Winnetou Contest. So thank you Boris for transporting me to the WildWest and I shall get to reading it a soon as possible :)

    Also thanks to Rez for her part in the prizes and all her support of the XWWC. You are both Lovely people!

    Oh yea also, it’s gone now for some reason but there was an FB App that came up with an amusing grave stone for you and when I did it it said as my epitaph “Was Visited by Chuck Norris” LOL Boris I’m scared :S hehe


    And now since this has something to do with writing here’s a story, but it’s not WildWest in nature it’s actually a follow up to this Story Which a couple folks including Nadia @xXxlovelylollipop and @lakakalo asked for a second part or continuation for.

    Also thanks to the suggestion of @promisesunshine I have altered the age of the girl in the first part to a couple years younger.

    So it’s just short and i’ll try to write something more Western styled as celebration of my new book soon but for now here it is:

    ~Part one Here~


     

    If she defocused it almost felt like time was moving in slow motion as the long desert road flew under the car. The roof was down and Grace’s long blonde hair blew up and around her face as trucks and cars rushed by, she’d been driving for three days, sleeping under the stars down dirt roads or in truck stops.

     

    Her mobile vibrated on the dash and the first few cords of Lyle Lovetts ‘In My Own Mind’ fought the wind to be heard before she answered.

    “Hey Mom….no I’m not gonna make it….I’m out of state, no, no…I’m not going to be back for a few days…well okay…I’m sorry I guess……yea I’ll speak to you later”

    She threw the phone back on the dash and flipped her sunglasses up as she squinted at the approaching sign.

     

    The prison was only another 100 miles.

     

    Everything inside was grey or pale green and dusty, it felt like somekind of storage warehouse. As she passed through the first few outer gates she could feel the eyes of the guards on her, she felt out of place and suddenly vulnerable, on her own surrounded by locked gates and armed men who all seemed cold and detached a trained lack of concern.

     

    Eventually the final door opened on the visitor room, it was large and blank apart from ten or so small tables with cheap plastic chairs huddled around them. Only one or two were occupied by other visitors and men in orange jumpsuits speaking in low murmurs, or just staring in silence at each other.

     

    Grace picked a seat that was caught in a shaft of warm sunlight that streamed in through the sharp concrete window, she then waited feeling the shadows of the window bars pass over her face as she gently tilted her head from left to right in the sun.

     

    It was almost 20 minuets before the door at the far end of the room opened, at first only a guard emerged. Grace shielded her eyes from the sun as she peered into the darkness of the doorway, then an orange jumpsuit appeared and Nate Parker walked slowly into the room.

     

    He paused when he saw her, he was older and his face was harder but he was the same man she’d met all those years ago. After a moment he continued and made his way slowly between the chairs and tables, eventually slipping into the chair across from her and resting his cuffed hands on the table.

     

    They sat there in silence for a while neither willing to look at the other, until eventually their eyes met.

    “Why’d you come here?” Nate asked almost angry.

    Grace smiled and looked down at her hands on the table.

    “I’m 21 now…I think I’m old enough to make my own dumb mistakes okay?” She said not looking up.

    Nate looked away at the sun pouring through the window. “I’m not getting out of here ya know”

    “Yea I know”

    Moments passed again, in silence as the two stared at each other, thoughts racing mouths still.

    “You happy?” Nate eventually asked.

    “Yea, I’m happy” she smiled as she spoke and looked into the distance.

    “I’d bail you out if I had the cash…we could go to a motel…and play cards”

    “Heh you just want another chance at beating me huh?” Nate said with a rye smile.

     

    Once again silence descended, until Grace finally spoke.

    “You weren’t going to see me were you?”

    “No”

    “You didn’t want to see me?”

    “No”

    “No you didn’t want to see me or no you didn’t not want to see me?”

    “You’re the only person I’ve wanted to see for years Grace”

    They stared at each other again and time passed. Eventually the guard knocked his night stick on the wall. It meant there was only five minutes left.

     

    “Why’d you come here!…Why!” Nate held his head in his hands, as he massaged his temples.

    “I don’t know…can you tell me?” Grace asked as she lent forwards and gently touched his hand.

    “Please keep your hands on your side of the table miss” A guard leaned forwards form the wall and pointed at her outstretched arms with his night stick.

     

    Silence once again fell on the table. Eventually time was up and the guards moved in slowly breaking up the groups and escorting the orange jumpsuits back to the small door at the back of the room.

     

    Nate and Grace stared at each other in silence until the heavy hand of a guard landed on Nates shoulder.

    “Please come back to see me” Nate looked into her eyes for as long as he could after he spoke, until he was lead away from the table.

     

    Grace watched him go, unable to speak, unable to move. Her only thought was of that night, lying listening to him breathing beside her, of the feeling of simply knowing he was there.

     

    That night she checked into the nearest chain motel to the prison. But she didn’t sleep, most of the night she just lay staring at the dull neon glow of the motel sign through the cheap drapes…The Cactus Flower Motel.

     

  • What a Hermit does on NewYears

    So I live with my Parents down the end of a road 10 miles from the nearest town which is closer to a village in size than a town.

    So what could I possibly get upto over NewYears?

    Well sadly over the past few years our neighbour count has vastly increased from 1 to at least 3!!!! :O Yea I know it’s terrible! :(

    And even worse last year one of our neighbours invited everyone to theirs for a NewYear get together. So since the precedent had been started this year it was another houses turn and so me and my mum (since my dad has rather skilfully developed a shield of isolation around him) headed off at 8:00.

    This was after we’d spent a fun day watching Malcolm In the Middle back to back while easting toast, and then later some soup :D

    So we got there, we were the first. And chatted with the lady that was hosting everyone until others began to arrive. Eventually there was 8 folks in the tiny upstairs flat of this lady and I was well topped up with Fizzy wine and uncomfortably getting along with people I neither knew or much cared to :/

    There was also food, WAY too much food and mostly meat (I’m pretty much a veggie, I eat fish but rarely eat meat, if at all) but since most of it was meat and there was so much and too few to finish most of it off, I had to face a BIG chunk of ham…yum :P

    Most of the evening was spent chatting with a rather nice Australian lady who was the partner of a friend of the host. She loved travel and seemed kind and supportive.

    But eventually my mum spotted the perfect time and snuck off to get our coats a good two or three hours before midnight, which is when it seemed everyone else wanted to stay for. And so we made our good byes I got a very nice hug from the Australian and we headed out into the cool night (oh yea it was VERY hot in there too) to scuttle back home :D  

    I’m happy to be neighbourly but only in short bursts lol

    And when we got back we found my dad dressed up in his Austrian 3 piece (bought from ebay of course) suit talking with my Bro who is currently in NZ and had just called on Skype :D

    So we chatted and generally caught up for a good long while and then got to celebrate the beginning of 2012 all together as a family…even if one was only there digitally ;)

    Of course much more Fizzy wine was drunk and after the call we settled down for more MITM until one of our oldest (both in age and duration) neighbours popped by after she had also left the celebration up the road. She’s a bit of a hard person to get on with and more than a little negative, but we had fun chatting and joking around, while my mum had to head back up to collect a shawl she’d left.

    Eventually near 3:00am we escorted our neighbour back to her house that’s in a small forest by ours. My dad was still wearing his Austrian suit and one of my Fedoras, while I went with my long coat and another Fedora :) so looking as our neighbour said like 1940′s hitmen we walked her back, had some brandy, said our goodnights, wished her the best for 2012 and finally headed off home.

    By 4:00am we were finally all back, my mum had chatted for a while longer with our neighbours and was half asleep in front of the TV.

    So finally at about 4:30am I got to bed, rather drunk and starting to feel a bit ill but happy and generally satisfied with the end of 2011.

    2012 began somewhere near 2:00PM which is when i finally woke up hahaha :S Not feeling well but it was all in all a good night.